Day.... Forever.

      It's been a very long time since I have written a blog post. It seems now that all of my blog posts from here on out will be updates for my mission; where I am with my paperwork, preparatory experiences, and whatever else seems to come out of my mind.

    As far as paper work goes, Bishop and I have been meeting at least once a month since March. Every bit of paperwork that I've had the opportunity to fill out has been filled out and I've been attending weekly mission prep classes. To see how close I am to my mission now than I was 8 months ago, not just time wise but in preparation is scary. I've been thinking a lot about my progression since then and though I am not quite to where I could be, I have made great strides towards my goal. My parents during this process have been ridiculously amazing. Though I will not receive their support financially, to know that I have their spiritual and emotional support is more than enough. There was a time when I didn't receive any support from them. Heavenly Father has since worked with them, has used me as His example, and has shown them that there is nothing to worry about. This reminds me of the story in 1 Nephi when Laman, Lemuel, and Nephi are sent to get the plates of brass from Laban. Laban was a ruler in Jerusalem and would have killed them with no problem. The three boys left from the wilderness where their family was staying and journeyed to obtain the plates. Laban was angry and, at first, the boys were unable to get the plates. After praying, Nephi obtains the plates from Laban and kills him. Laban's servant Ishmael is brought back with the boys. In the meantime, Sariah, the boys' mother, is worried about her boys and cries to Lehi, the boys' father, that they are dead and they never should have gone. Lehi speaks to her, telling her that he has received this vision from God and that their boys are going to be okay. Sariah takes comfort in this and soon after the boys return safely causing much joy. This story in a way is similar to how my parents may feel. It's scary to send your child into a place you don't know of, going through trials you cannot be there for, unaware of what is going on in your child's life and it's perfectly okay for my parents to feel this way. What they don't know is that I am going to slay the people of Laban, I will bring back the righteous to the army of God. I will make it home safe, in the arms of my Heavenly Father. I don't know what I am going to encounter wherever I am but I know I will be led by the Spirit to do the things which are right and which are pertinent to brings others unto Christ. That's my purpose as a missionary and that's what I will do with the guidance of my Heavenly Father and the Spirit.
I still have a far way to go but every day that I have to progress and grow with my Heavenly Father is a day that I cherish and look forward to. I hope that I will recieve the necessary support that I need to make this progression and I hope to make my Heavenly Father and my family proud.

"And I was led by the Spirit, not knowing beforehand the things which I should do."
1 Nephi 4:6




Don't forget to check out my mission prep facebook group for updates!
https://www.facebook.com/groups/404892552893232/

If you feel so inclined to financially support my efforts check out my GoFundMe account:
http://www.gofundme.com/12jhhk

Day 103.

A little video I made today. 

God is so important in my life today.

I can never cease to praise Him.

I hope you never will either.

Day 64-69.

Hey Everybody,
Just an update for today. In the recent week I've been spending time home with family and friends while being on winter break from college. I've had so much fun playing sports, eating ice cream (so much for my 40 day abstinent project), hanging out with family, going out with friends, and Harry Potter marathons. To be completely honest, I've almost completely forgot about getting back into the Word. There are times when I would look at my Scriptures and feel that it would be too much work to actually read a chapter or two. Blogging has seemed like a huge inconvenience and almost a hassle because I "never had anything spiritual to write about". I'm close to my first temple trip and I feel as unworthy as ever. There's no use in beating myself up because when I do that I only hurt myself and let the devil take over. I've decided to beat up satan. Starting tomorrow I am going to read at least one verse a day. I am going to study my preach my gospel and I'm going to pray more than I think. I want each and every one of you to hold me accountable! 
       I know I'm not alone in these feelings of laziness. There are times that we can all feel dragged down by needing to read the scriptures and pray but I want you to remember that these feelings are not your own. These are the feelings we have felt because of Satan. I encourage you to do what I'm about to. Find one verse from any of the scriptures and memorize it. On the days that you feel dragged down, quote that verse in your mind or out loud. I've heard that a verse a day keeps satan away. We don't have to read 5,000 pages a day to keep him away, we just need to read one verse and pray about it. Continue to ask the Spirit into your life and always keep your head up. There may be darkness now but darkness can never prevail over the light.

Day 51-63.

It's been a long while since I've written my last blog. It's not always ideal for me to write my blog but when I decided to begin it became an every day challenge for me as I prepared for my mission. It has been a rough couple of weeks to say the least. I've learned different lessons from my obstacles.
1) Pray, A LOT.
Never let your praying knees get tired. Prayer is one of the closest ways we can be to God, other than going to the temple. When we take the time and to pray and LISTEN, we recieve the answers we search for. Helaman 5:30 says, "And it came to pass when they heard this voice, and beheld that it was not a voice of thunder, neither was it a voice of a great tumultuous noise, but behold, it was a still voice of perfect mildness, as if it had been a whisper, and it did pierce even to the very soul—". The Lord does not speak in thunderous voices or through marvelous images, He speaks to us most through that still, small voice. We cannot hear His voice amidst crying, our own work, our busyness of our every day; we hear His voice when we quiet down and listen. Be faithful. We can recieve all things through prayer. I have a testimony of prayer. I know that our prayers are continually answered and I know that every prayer we raise to God WILL be answered.
2) Follow your "gut feeling".
That gut feeling you have is the Holy Ghost guiding you. I heard from a wise person once that our hearts and our minds may tell us different things but it's the feeling in your stomach that we need to pay attention to; this may just be the feeling of the Spirit. Personally, it is hard for me to describe what the Spirit feels like. President Boyd K. Packer explained: “The Holy Ghost speaks with a voice that you feel more than you hear. … While we speak of ‘listening’ to the whisperings of the Spirit, most often one describes a spiritual prompting by saying, ‘I had a feeling …’” He continued: “This voice of the Spirit speaks gently, prompting you what to do or what to say, or it may caution or warn you” (in Conference Report, Oct. 1994, 77; or Ensign, Nov. 1994, 60). Alma tells us that these feelings “will begin to swell within your breasts; and when you feel these swelling motions, ye will begin to say within yourselves—It must needs be that this is a good seed, or that the word is good, for it beginneth to enlarge my soul; yea, it beginneth to enlighten my understanding, yea, it beginneth to be delicious to me.” (Alma 32:28.)
3) Never stop forgiving.
It can be hard at times to keep forgiving those that do you wrong. James E. Frost said, "If we can find forgiveness in our hearts for those who have caused us hurt and injury, we will rise to a higher level of self-esteem and well-being." “Forgiveness is freeing up and putting to better use the energy once consumed by holding grudges, harboring resentments, and nursing unhealed wounds. It is rediscovering the strengths we always had and relocating our limitless capacity to understand and accept other people and ourselves.” As Jesus forgave, so must we. When we keep remembering our failures and mistakes, continue to harbor bad feelings against others, and refuse to forgive ourselves or others, we waste both time and energy. We accomplish nothing. We inhibit spiritual progress.
4) Don't give up on yourself.
These past couple of weeks, I've found myself in and out of discouragement. I was ready to give up and in some areas of my life I have. While speaking to some of my missionary friends, one reminded me that we learn from these experiences and that going through these feelings is normal. "You shouldn't be disappointed in yourself but I'm glad you hold yourself to such high standards." I heard one of them say. It's important to hold ourself to high standards but when we don't quite meet our standards, we shouldn't be disappointed in ourselves and give up, we need to see it as a time to press forward and correct ourselves. God never gave up on us, why should we?


I could go on forever with the things I've learned but the entire internet wouldn't be large enough for what I learn every day. It's important that we find something to learn every day. What is life but a learning experience? I am grateful for the time I have on earth. I am grateful for a loving God and the blessings He has bestowed upon me. I encourage all of you to seek to learn at least one thing every day. 

Day 50.

Only 300 days left until I am 21 and eligable for a mission!!!

I cannot believe that 50 days have already gone by. I haven't gotten so much accomplished, experienced much and have so much more left to do!

I've chosen to go on a mission for many reasons that I cannot explain. The biggest reason I have chosen to go on a mission is because I want to serve my Father in Heaven and bring to Him His children. I love the Book of Mormon very much and I also love my Heavenly Father very much and hope that I may be able to serve Him well. Below is a video from Mormon.org that will explain the importance of missionary work a little better.

AND ALSO

Day 49.

Look Not Behind Thee-- Genesis 19:17

Day 48.

Today, I had the privilege to say goodbye to a good friend of mine who is leaving for his mission on Monday. Saying goodbye to people, especially someone who you consider close to you, is hard to do. We feel heartache for the one who is leaving us but we know that someday we will see them again. I wonder what it must have felt like for God to give us His son. When Jesus left the Heavens to come to earth I wonder what His father felt. It couldn't have been easy but He knew that Jesus was going to return to Him after He had saved all of mankind. Just like we have friends that leave their homes to serve a mission for the church and bring others unto Christ, God must have felt that way too, proud, joyous, happy, anxious. God must have felt just like we do when our missionaries leave us because Jesus was the greatest missionary of them all and He made His Father very proud just like our missionaries make us feel.

Day 47.

Happy Friday!
I thought today we all needed a laugh after a long week of school, or work. BYU DivineComedy is a drama group at Bringham Young University in Provo, Utah. In the skit I have put below, it takes place in Relief Society and Elder's Quorum which are both groups within our church. I found this clip very humorus and I hope you do too!

Day 46.

                   I love BYU DivineComedy.. Actually I pretty much love everything BYU comes out with! I love this video because it shows how dishonest we can be sometimes in our conversations with others. We are to do unto others as we would want done unto ourselves. I believe if we want someone to listen to our problems or conversations we need to listen to theirs as well. How honest are you in your life? You may not realize it sometimes but all of us are! I know I can be.

Day 45.

It's day 45 somehow. It being a wednesday, I usually have a night class called Social and Ethnic Diversity.. which is essentially about racism. I started to think about this class as I sit in it for 3 hours once a week (I would hope I would think about it). The verse 16 in John 3 came to mind one night,

                  "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

    A little background behind this verse; John 3:16 is one of the most widely quoted verses from the Bible and has been called the most famous Bible verse. It has also been called the "Gospel in a nutshell".  Did you know the phrase "John 3:16" is very short and can be written inconspicuously in out-of-the-way locations. In the U.S., the In-N-Out Burger chain prints it on the inside of the bottom rim of their paper cups, clothing chain Forever 21 and Heritage print it on the bottom of their shopping bags, and Tornado Fuel Saver prints it on the box.

While all of these facts are pretty cool, they're not the reason I thought of this verse. My wednesday night class challenges me to think about the various ways racism occurs, the reasons why and the people it happens to. While our modern world may seem important I went to the one place I knew was most important in my life; the Scriptures. In John 3:16 it is said that God loved the world so He gave His son to die for our sins. While reading that verse I didn't come across any specifications like God gave His son to only die for the sins of African Americans or for the Irish or for males or just females. The verse says WHOSOEVER believeth in Him should not perish.

The atonement is not just for one group of people, it is for all those who come to Him seeking and desiring to love Him and therefore committing to follow his commandments.

The scriptures are what matter most in my life and so does God. God isn't racist. God sent His ONLY son, to die for EVERY PERSON'S sins. Let's not forget that.

Day 44.

Intelligent Obedience

Obedience to God’s commandments helps us qualify for all the blessings of eternal life.

God does not want us to follow His divine guidance blindly or out of fear of punishment. He wants us to exercise intelligent obedience of our own free will. We need to gain our own witness, or belief, that the commandments really come from Him and help us live happier lives. To obtain this witness, we have to use faith. We have to have a real desire, and we have to be willing to do the work necessary to know these things.

In the Book of Mormon, Heavenly Father makes the following promise:

“When ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost.” (Moroni 10:4)

We can know for ourselves that these things are true. When we know that something is true, we will want to live accordingly for the rest of our lives. The commandments won't feel like arbitrary rules from a detached God. They'll feel like divine guidance that helps us navigate the confusion of life on earth. We will see the benefits of following this guidance in our day-to-day lives and we will feel a stronger sense of peace and spirituality.

(Taken from Mormon.org.. Check out this website for any questions and check out profiles of members of the church who answer these questions as well.)

Day 43.

Why is the Sabbath Day so important? On the website Mormon.org I found this article about keeping the Sabbath Day holy.

Keep the Sabbath Day Holy

Sunday is a special day. On Sunday we can focus on the Lord, our families, and our friends.

In this day and age, Sunday has started to feel like any other day. Many of us have to work, and after that we try to get everything else done that we didn't get done on Saturday. It seems like the weekend feels busier than the rest of the week. But Sunday, or the Sabbath, is a time to worship God and to give us a rest from our day-to-day obligations. After creating the earth in six days, God set the seventh aside as a day of rest and remembrance. On Sunday we can spend time with friends and family, visit the sick or lonely, spend extra time studying the scriptures and go to Church. At Church we sing, pray, and discuss the gospel with the other members of the congregation and we also take the sacrament in remembrance of the Savior. At Church Mormons participate in the sacrament by eating bread and drinking water that was prepared to symbolize the body and blood of Jesus Christ. We can take that time to meditate on how Jesus Christ can help us and think about how we can better keep the covenants we have made with Him.

Besides giving us a rest from the stresses of the workweek, keeping the Sabbath day holy shows respect for God and reminds us to slow down our busy lives to give thanks to our Creator. Sunday is a day to look forward to, one when we get to enjoy the things that really matter.

Day 42.

Finally!!! A day to slee... nope! GOOD MORNING IT'S 7:30!!! Great, just when I though I could sleep in my body has actually gotten used to waking up early. Today is a special day. Friends of mine and I are going to visit with some really good friends in fairport! Plus, we're going to the mall... could it get any better? nope! It's been great being able to visit with my missionary friends and catch up but one thing has been on my mind. How do I become a good missionary? I have plenty of good examples around me, each unique in their mission. As silly as it sounds, I sometimes find myself observing these young men and women and ultimately this leads to me observing myself. I've come up with 3 things that I can do to become a pretty decent missionary.
1) Pray immensely.
I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.... if I ask. Nothing can be granted unto you unless you ask. Yes, Heavenly Father knows our hearts and minds, but He wants us to ask for Him. We need to rely on Him and ask and talk to Him. There are times when I simply just talk with Him as if I were talking to a friend of mine on the phone. Pray and ye shall recieve. Ask and it shall be given unto you.
2)Read scriptures.
It always comes back to this. I know in all of the blogs of done, I usually stress the importance of reading my scriptures. I know how important they are. I have prayed about them and I've prayed before reading them and I know that Heavenly Father has given me answers through them. Our scriptures not only give us answers but they are the outline for our lives! We should learn so much through them. That's why they were given to us.
3)Be a good friend.
Finally, I need to be a good listener and love unconditionally. By being a good friend, we show what our church is all about. Loving one another. How boring is it to be mad at someone or to judge someone or to let them be alone in their lives? Not only are you not following God's word but you're also closing yourself up. Open up! Share your testimony and delight in God's word. Be a good friend to somebody.

Though these are only 3 out of the many ways I can be a good missionary, these, to me, are the first 3 babysteps I can take to becoming what Heavenly Father wants me to be.

Day 41.

Ah yes, another Friday. Isn't it wonderful the feeling that Friday brings? This Friday however has been a strange one. Busy; full of movement, emotions, work, etc. Yesterday I recieved the news from my roommate that she was moving to a room next door to mine. She's a nursing major and spring of Sophomore year proves to be a tough semester for Nursing students. I understood. It's tough sometimes to lose a roommate or a friend. I'm not losing her as my friend but as a roommate. Looking on the brightside of things I've found that moving a room around and redecorating can be very relaxing (unless you're like me and every move is like playing the game "unblock me") From this situation we can gather that in negative times we need to find a positive side. We need not to reflect on what is bothering us but find what we can pull out as a positive consequence. I've found that as I go on in college that a lot of the dreams that I had drawn for myself have, at times, been erased and re-drawn. Nothing has stayed the same and in that I know Heavenly Father's hands have been in my life, redirecting my thoughts and redrawing my path. It is because of Heavenly Father that I smile through the storms and laugh during the dark times. I know that in the dark times is when Heavenly Father is with me most and I rejoice because He is with me. Sometimes we have to be brought low for Heavenly Father to raise us higher.

Day 40.

As a Social Work major I tend to have a lot of time on my hands even though I'm a full time  student, who has a tutor once a week, has a night class, and serves as the Student Social Work Association Chaplain-- still there is time on my hands. What do I do with this time? The correct answer should be that I read my scriptures and study dilligently but unfortunately and sadly enough, it is not. Instead I watch old episodes of Kyle XY which used to be on ABCfamily once upon a time. It's easy for us to lose our focus. It's easy for us to ignore our scriptures. It's easy for us to come up with excuses but what's my excuse? I don't have one. Part of the reason I started this blog was so that I could track my growth over the year that I had leading to my mission. I don't have an excuse for not reading my scriptures. All too often I forget that it's a huge privilege to have my scriptures and to be able to read them. When this occurs we need to push aside our own feelings and pray to Heavenly Father. Invite the Spirit back into your life and sit down and read. I encourage you to, when you're discouraged, to sit and pray. Dwell with Heavenly Father for a few moments and while you're speaking with Him, invite His Spirit into your life.

Day 39.

I mentioned in an earlier blog that I had the task of finishing the Book of Mormon by early January. Well that didn't exactly happen although, I did make it to Alma 30 which is good progress. I'm now halfway through the Book of Mormon. As I was reading in Alma 28 I came across a section that I liked. Alma 28:12-14 says, "While many thousands of others truly mourn for the loss of their kindred, yet they rejoice and exult in the hope, and even know, according to the promises of the Lord, that they are raised to dwell at the right hand of God, in a state of never-ending happiness. And thus we see how great the inequality of man is because of sin and transgression, and the power of the devil, which comes by the cunning plans which he hath devised to ensnare the hearts of men. And thus we see the great call of diligence of men to labor in the vineyards of the Lord; and thus we see the great reason of sorrow, and also of rejoicing—sorrow because of death and destruction among men, and joy because of the light of Christ unto life." Upon deciding to go on a mission I knew I would have to leave my family and being a pioneer in my family I knew they might not fully understand my decision. Verse 12 says that while many people mourned for the loss of their family that they also rejoiced and had hope because they were with the Lord. I hope that while I'm away and my family may mourn the loss of my presence that they also rejoice because I am doing God's work. Heavenly Father blesses families that stick together and families of missionaries. I have been promised that I will be blessed for going on my mission and not only will I be blessed but my family will be too and will also be taken care of. This makes me so happy! I rejoice in the Lord for this. I love my family very much and I would worry about them so much if I didn't know that the Lord would take care of them in my absence. Verse 13 goes on to say that we're inequal because of sin and the devil has a plan for us (just like the Lord). Without missionary work, I'm sure the devil could easily ensnare the hearts of men. The devil has a plan for all of us. He hates the work of the Lord but we also know that he cannot contend against the Lord's work like he couldn't use Zeezrom earlier in Alma to bring down the church. Finally verse 14 says, in response to verse 13 that because the devil has the plan to ensnare the hearts of men that the Lord has called for men to labor in His vineyards. Like in Jacob 5, the Lord needs us, as His missionaries, to work in His vineyard and help people come to Him. He doesn't want to see destruction among men but He wants to see the light of Christ unto them. I take my prompting to become a missionary seriously. I love the Lord, I love His church and I want to help people come to it because I know in the end they will be happy, they will rejoice in Heavenly Father's light and they will experience the joy that I have being a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.



Day 38.

"I got a pocket, got a pocket full of sunshine, I got a love and I know that it's all mine, ohhhh.."

These words are not unfamiliar to my ears at 7:30 in the morning on my way to breakfast before an 8am class. In preparing for this new semester I startegically created a music playlist on my ipod specifically for the morning. On this playlist you'll find Pocket Full of Sunshine by Natasha Bedingfield, Walking on Sunshine sung by BYU Vocal Point and songs like Light up the Sky by The Afters. These songs no doubt lift my mood in the morning but there's something specific about the line I wrote out for you in the beginning. My pocket full of sunshine is Heavenly Father himself and the love that is all mine is His. John 3:16; "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." is one of the most quoted lines of scripture which I would think would be right next to Phillipians 4:13; "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me."But in regards to John 3:16 have you taken a look at 1 John 3:16? I find that I love this verse even more than John 3:16 because it's more specific: "Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren." Heavenly Father truly loves us. His son laid down His life for us. He knew what He was doing when He hung on the cross for us. He suffered during His life so we may not have to. In return, have we followed His commandments, loved one another, or done much of what He commands? Are we making the ultimate sacrifice? I challenge you, throughout your day, week, month to think about the sacrifices you have made for God. Think about what you could possibly sacrifice. Think about how you can better treat His people. We know He loves us because He laid down His life for us. But have you shown Him lately that you love Him?

I am constantly reminded in the morning about the love that Heavenly Father has for us but it doesn't stop in the morning. It continues always.

P.S- To all my readers.. I want to know what you want to see in my blogs. Help me out.. Facebook me, email me, comment. I appreciate feedback!

Day 37.

I was thinking this morning while getting ready for church how much emphasis our society today puts on beauty. It's not the inward beauty that they care about either, it's the outward. Have you noticed how over time that perception has even changed as well? The definition of beauty today is to be skinny, tan, long beautiful hair, white teeth, a clear face, and dressed to impress. Why are outward appearances so important? Why do I feel the need to stand in front of the mirror every morning doing my hair and applying makeup for 15 minutes? Media plays a huge part but what about ourselves? We are brought down every day by the standards of society because we're not skinny enough, or our hair isn't long enough or we're just not pretty enough but did you know that when when God created man it was good but when He created woman it was great! Women, we are so important. We are more than good! Heavenly Father made us for important reasons and we are beautiful in His eyes! Look not upon the earthly standards of being beautiful because no matter what, we were created beautiful and will always be beautiful! We, as a people, are beautiful in many ways! Inside we can be kind, caring, compassionate, fun, smart, and so many other things! Why strive to be perfect for one person on earth when you are already beautiful to a better man, Heavenly Father. The Bible says, 1 Samuel 16:7b "The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." What does your heart look like? Is it pleasing to God? This is how we are beautiful. Please God, He's the only man worth pleasing. The most important thing is to be yourself! Don't change who you are because God made you who you are and is sculpting you to be a better you! Beauty is in the eyes of God. 

I leave you with this. Do not give into the demands of the media or our society.

Be yourself, Be better for God and most importantly

Be.YOU.tiful.

Day 36.

I LOVE THE BOOK OF MORMON!
that's my testimony to you today. I have never felt so inspired and happy to be a part of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I KNOW this church is true. I KNOW that the Book of Mormon is true. I KNOW that by instruction from Heavenly Father and Jesus, Joesph Smith restored the true church. I LOVE Heavenly Father. His church makes me feel accepted, loved, and free. When I read the scriptures that Heavenly Father has given to us I feel truly blessed to be God's people. We are so lucky and special that Heavenly Father loves us. Heavenly Father has a plan for all of us. If you want to feel loved, accepted, inspired and free join the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. We're a family, we're brothers and sisters of Christ. Heavenly Father is the king of the Heavens and of Earth, as His children we are free to be the princes and princesses we truly are! I hope Heavenly Father works in your life like He has worked in mine! Let His Spirit guide you.

I say all these things in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Day 35.

CTR. Choose the Right. Do you always choose the right? It's very hard to choose the right all the time. I know this is something I struggle with too. What can we do?

1) Pray. 

I find that prayer helps all things. It shouldn't be relied on as the only thing to do but I believe there are 3 parts to praying. There's the actual praying of course so speaking, then there's listening. What is God saying to you? and finally there's action. Act upon what God has asked you to do. 

2) Read your Scriptures.

I know that for me when I read my scriptures that I choose to not doing anything wrong (as much as I humanly can). We're going to mess up, it's expected but the scriptures put my mind in a rational state that I actually feel like Heavenly Father is making my path straighter to prevent me from doing something fumb.

3) Think.

Sometimes we need a simple band around our finger that reads CTR to remind us to think but we need to remember this all the time! It's important that before you do something mean, silly, not particularly smart or anything that would not be considered good, think. Think about how this may effect not only you but the people around you as well as Heavenly Father. Is this thing you're about to do going to disappoint Him? 

I know that we're all human and make mistakes but how many mistakes have you made because you weren't thinking? Actions speak A LOT louder than words. You can talk the talk but can you walk the walk?

Day 34.

It's one of those Thursdays that are filled with exhaustion and mind dysfunction. Today and yesterday I've been very adamant about getting a certain Statistics homework assignment done. Yesterday I pulled it up on my computer to begin calculating (I feel good using this word.) and I pulled up a pretty confusing graph asking to do some functions I've never seen before. Keep in mind while reading this that I haven't taken official math since my Sophomore year of high schpp; and I am now in my Sophomore year of college.. it's been awhile. You could imagine my confusion at the problems I was given. As I'm struggling through the problems I'm doing I can't help but wonder to myself "when did I miss this in class?? I never fell asleep!" I worked on two problems for over 2 hours! And I still had a lot more to do! Exasperated, I decided to work on the other two units that I had yet to complete. As I went to click into the other unit I noticed the dates under the three assignments I had yet to complete.. These assignments aren't due until NEXT week. No wonder I didn't understand. I had already completed what I needed to for tomorrow's class.
How does this relate to the Gospel? We can be so caught up in trying to read the Gospel and understand everything and do so much for our Heavenly Father that we don't stop and see where we are. I tried to finish this assignment without looking to see when it was due or when my professor wanted it done. Heavenly Father doesn't expect us to finish all of our assignments at once. We need time to learn and grow. We don't come into the world knowing everything there is to know about the Gospel. We progressively learn if we're dilligent enough to seek and indulge. I still have more statistics to learn before I can finish my next stats assignment and if I'm dilligent enough in my studies I will retain the information. Take time to read, and re-read and pray about what we learn from Heavenly Father and put it to practice before you continue to learn! Let's get an A in life (I'm so corny.)!

I know that Heavenly Father wants us to seek his word and His truth. I know we can know God if we're dilligent! I pray that you are dilligent in seeking the truth!

I say all these things in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Day 33.

Why did I become a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints? I've been asked this a few times by friends and family and my answer always remains the same but the length of my answer always changes because I have grown within the church and I have learned so much and my testimony has grown as well. It may seem like I'm back tracking in my blogs but it's never bad to talk about my decision to join the church.
In the beginning of my freshmen year of college I took a class called principles of writing. Our first paper was to be a personal narrative and I wrote about my baptismal experience. Though I have left quite a few details out, I would like to share with you the paper I wrote about my baptism a month after it happened:

"Maren Schultz

Principles of Writing 101-05

K. Buckert

9/18/2010

“Would you like to meet with the missionaries?” He asked me, sitting in the front seat of my car. Marshal and I had only been dating almost a month at that point. I had always been interested in world cultures and religions and this seemed like a good opportunity to find out more about his. I had recently learned that Marshal was a part of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I had heard many rumors about this religion and was eager to satisfy my curiosities about them. Marshal quickly picked up his phone and called Elder Daw and Elder Harrell. We met with them later that week and they told me a story about a young boy named Joseph Smith. He was searching for the right church to belong to back in the 1800’s. At that time, there were nearly 18 different churches in his small area. You could understand how he would easily be confused. Joseph, one day, went behind his house into the grove. He kneeled down in the grass and prayed to Heavenly Father about which he should join. A pillar of light shone onto Joseph. Heavenly Father and His son appeared, “This is My Beloved Son. Hear Him,” Heavenly Father said to him. He revealed that Joseph was to restore His church. Joseph Smith obeyed Heavenly Father that day and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints was initiated. 

            After hearing that story I thought in my head, “Wow, I am kind of like Joseph.” I had been searching for the right church for years. My past had consisted of drug and alcohol abuse which had caused me to forget who Heavenly Father was. I had gotten so frustrated trying to figure out in which faith I was supposed to invest. I had decided to take another path and it was not one that God wanted me to be on. I had made friends with people that I will never forget. I felt a part of something.

 Before the missionaries left, they offered me a Book of Mormon to read. I happily accepted their gift and after our visit, I thanked them and Marshal and I got to talking about the meeting. “I love it!” I said as he smiled at me. “This is great. I would like to meet with them again!” As we continued to meet with the missionaries, I felt more and more like this religion was what I’d been searching for, for years! I felt the truth and the passion. Marshal kept inviting them over and eventually we went to a church meeting. Though very different than what I was accustomed to, I felt welcomed and special, something I had never felt before. As weeks went by, we kept meeting with the missionaries on regular occasions. Marshal and I started to read the Book of Mormon together and pray regularly.  One evening baptism was brought up in conversation. Marshal looked at me and said, “Honey, it’s up to you. I don’t want you to make this decision for me. I want you to make it because you want to.” I replied to him without hesitation, “This is what I want to do.” He was delighted and so were the missionaries. We quickly started to discuss dates and who would be a part of my ceremony. With all plans set, I grew more and more excited! I had never made this decision for myself before. My parents of course weren’t too thrilled and neither were my friends. They pleaded and begged against my baptism. I was hurt to find out that neither my parents nor my friends wanted to be there. I didn’t have anyone supporting me other than Marshal and the church. They didn’t understand why I wanted to convert to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and even after much explaining they were still set in their ways. My father was United Methodist and my mother was previously Catholic but converted to Presbyterian. I couldn’t grasp how they could both have their own religions and be baptized and confirmed in those but when I came to discover my calling, they opposed it. All I could do was pray. I prayed a lot that week. I had read a passage in the Bible that said, “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.” God spoke to me. I knew everything was going to be alright.

The day of my baptism quickly approached and I was jumping out of my skin with anticipation. We met with the missionaries one last time the night before I was to be baptized. We talked about my feelings, picked out a robe, and talked about how the ceremony would go. That night, Marshal and I were so excited that we practiced the baptism in his pool. We must have looked silly because of how many times he dipped me in. Marshal, the next day, was going to be ordained a higher level of the priesthood so he could baptize me. I can’t even begin to explain my feelings. I was anxious. I was really hoping my parents and my friends would be there for me. The next day, we attended church. Everyone was so delighted to hear about my baptism and I was growing more nervous than before! I kept thinking, “Will my friends and family even show up to support me?” My friends and I had a rough month together. We were fighting about my decision and I had prayed for them in hopes Heavenly Father would open their minds. The time had finally come. I changed into the white ceremonial robe and approached the doors of the chapel. As I stood there with Marshal, I saw my father walking towards me. Surprised, I wrapped my arms around him, thanking him for coming. Later on, my mother also arrived. I was very happy to see that even though they didn’t support my decision that they respected it enough to come be with me the day of my baptism however, my friends had not shown. I was a little disappointed but just knowing that my parents were there and that Marshal was always by my side made me forget about how bad I felt. The ceremony began. I was so nervous and happy that I could not stop smiling. Marshal sat on my left side, squeezing my hand with excitement. The appointed speaker spoke about Baptism and its importance and then the time came, when I was to be immersed in water, just like Jesus Christ was and many others before and after Him. The doors opened to the baptismal font and there were many people in the room. At the time it felt like it was just me, Marshal and God. Marshal blessed me and then dipped me back into the water. As I came up, I remembered the oaths and vows I had made to Heavenly Father. We had previously joked with the missionaries that I would be sinless for a couple seconds until the thought of being sinless entered my mind. My pure, sinless state lasted just as long but I felt awesome! I was renewed. I quickly changed and entered back into the chapel, Marshal at hand. The ceremony ended and I thanked everyone for coming. “So, how do you feel now?” I heard several church members ask. Searching for the right words to say, in hopes of satisfying all their questions and expectations, I quietly said, “Very good. I am glad that I made the right decision.”

Heavenly Father and his son have changed my life. I know that this church is true. I know that Jesus is my savior and I know that this is where Heavenly Father wants me to be. "

In my paper I left out the details of Heavenly Father's, the Holy Spirit's and Jesus Christ's work in me. I have been made into a new person by these powers. No matter where you come from, who you are, what you've done, who you've done them to we can ALL repent and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ. There is not one thing that Heavenly Father will not forgive if we truly repent in the way that we are supposed to. I am more than happy that I made the decision to become a part of Christ's church. I cannot explain to you in detail what my feelings were in making my decision but after I prayer much about it, Heavenly Father spoke to me confirming that my decision was correct. All we have to do is ask of God. James 1:5 tells us, "If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him." If you're unsure, pray to God, ask Him what you're unsure about. Be dilligent and seek knowledge in His word. He will answer you.

I say all these things in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Day 32.

In a lesson with the missionaries, we read Alma 24. This chapter was so amazing, I just had to share it! I will highlight a few verses in the chapter that stuck out to me! I took this chapter off of the LDS.org website to share with you.

Alma 24.

The Lamanites come against the people of God—The Anti-Nephi-Lehies rejoice in Christ and are visited by angels—They choose to suffer death rather than to defend themselves—More Lamanites are converted. About 90–77 B.C.

 1 And it came to pass that the Amalekites and the Amulonites and the Lamanites who were in the land of ^aAmulon, and also in the land of ^bHelam, and who were in the land of ^cJerusalem, and in fine, in all the land round about, who had not been converted and had not taken upon them the name of ^dAnti-Nephi-Lehi, were stirred up by the Amalekites and by the Amulonites to anger against their brethren.

 2 And their hatred became exceedingly sore against them, even insomuch that they began to rebel against their king, insomuch that they would not that he should be their king; therefore, they took up arms against the people of Anti-Nephi-Lehi.

 3 Now the king conferred the kingdom upon his son, and he called his name Anti-Nephi-Lehi.

 4 And the king died in that selfsame year that the Lamanites began to make preparations for war against the people of God.

 5 Now when Ammon and his brethren and all those who had come up with him saw the preparations of the Lamanites to destroy their brethren, they came forth to the land of Midian, and there Ammon met all his brethren; and from thence they came to the land of Ishmael that they might hold a ^acouncil with Lamoni and also with his brother Anti-Nephi-Lehi, what they should do to defend themselves against the Lamanites.

 6 Now there was not one soul among all the people who had been converted unto the Lord that would take up arms against their brethren; nay, they would not even make any preparations for war; yea, and also their king commanded them that they should not.

 7 Now, these are the words which he said unto the people concerning the matter: I thank my God, my beloved people, that our great God has in goodness sent these our brethren, the Nephites, unto us to preach unto us, and to convince us of the^atraditions of our wicked fathers.

 8 And behold, I thank my great God that he has given us a portion of his Spirit to soften our hearts, that we have ^aopened a correspondence with these brethren, the Nephites.

 9 And behold, I also thank my God, that by opening this correspondence we have been convinced of our ^asins, and of the many murders which we have committed.

 10 And I also thank my God, yea, my great God, that he hath granted unto us that we might repent of these things, and also that he hath ^aforgiven us of those our many sins and murders which we have committed, and taken away the ^bguilt from our hearts, through the merits of his Son.

 11 And now behold, my brethren, since it has been all that we could do (as we were the most lost of all mankind) to repent of all our sins and the many murders which we have committed, and to get God to ^atake them away from our hearts, for it was all we could do to repent sufficiently before God that he would take away our stain—

 12 Now, my best beloved brethren, since God hath taken away our stains, and our swords have become bright, then let us stain our swords no more with the blood of our brethren.

 13 Behold, I say unto you, Nay, let us retain our swords that they be not stained with the blood of our brethren; for perhaps, if we should stain our swords ^aagain they can no more be ^bwashed bright through the blood of the Son of our great God, which shall be shed for the atonement of our sins.

 14 And the great God has had mercy on us, and made these things known unto us that we might not perish; yea, and he has made these things known unto us beforehand, because he loveth our^asouls as well as he loveth our children; therefore, in his mercy he doth visit us by his angels, that the ^bplan of salvation might be made known unto us as well as unto future generations.

 15 Oh, how merciful is our God! And now behold, since it has been as much as we could do to get our stains taken away from us, and our swords are made bright, let us ^ahide them away that they may be kept bright, as a testimony to our God at the last day, or at the day that we shall be brought to stand before him to be judged, that we have not stained our swords in the blood of our brethren since he imparted his word unto us and has made us ^bclean thereby.

**** 16 And now, my brethren, if our brethren seek to destroy us, behold, we will hide away our swords, yea, even we will bury them deep in the earth, that they may be kept bright, as a testimony that we have never used them, at the last day; and if our brethren destroy us, behold, we shall ^ago to our God and shall be saved.****

 17 And now it came to pass that when the king had made an end of these sayings, and all the people were assembled together, they took their swords, and all the weapons which were used for the shedding of man’s blood, and they did ^abury them up deep in the earth.

 18 And this they did, it being in their view a testimony to God, and also to men, that they ^anever would use weapons again for the shedding of man’s blood; and this they did, vouching and^bcovenanting with God, that rather than shed the blood of their brethren they would ^cgive up their own lives; and rather than take away from a brother they would give unto him; and rather than spend their days in idleness they would labor abundantly with their hands.

 19 And thus we see that, when these Lamanites were brought to^abelieve and to know the truth, they were ^bfirm, and would suffer even unto death rather than commit sin; and thus we see that they buried their weapons of peace, or they buried the weapons of war, for peace.

 20 And it came to pass that their brethren, the Lamanites, made preparations for war, and came up to the land of Nephi for the purpose of destroying the king, and to place ^aanother in his stead, and also of destroying the people of Anti-Nephi-Lehi out of the land.

 21 Now when the people saw that they were coming against them they went out to meet them, and ^aprostrated themselves before them to the earth, and began to call on the name of the Lord; and thus they were in this attitude when the Lamanites began to fall upon them, and began to slay them with the sword.

 22 And thus without meeting any resistance, they did slay a^athousand and five of them; and we know that they are blessed, for they have gone to dwell with their God.

 23 Now when the Lamanites saw that their brethren would not flee from the sword, neither would they turn aside to the right hand or to the left, but that they would lie down and ^aperish, and^bpraised God even in the very act of perishing under the sword—

 24 Now when the Lamanites saw this they did ^aforbear from slaying them; and there were many whose hearts had ^bswollen in them for those of their brethren who had fallen under the sword, for they repented of the things which they had done.

 25 And it came to pass that they threw down their weapons of war, and they would not take them again, for they were stung for the murders which they had committed; and they came down even as their brethren, relying upon the mercies of those whose arms were lifted to slay them.

 26 And it came to pass that the people of God were joined that day by more than the number who had been slain; and those who had been slain were righteous people, therefore we have no reason to doubt but what they were ^asaved.

 27 And there was not a wicked man slain among them; but there were more than a thousand brought to the knowledge of the truth; thus we see that the Lord worketh in many ^aways to the salvation of his people.

 28 Now the greatest number of those of the Lamanites who slew so many of their brethren were Amalekites and Amulonites, the greatest number of whom were after the ^aorder of the ^bNehors.

 29 Now, among those who joined the people of the Lord, there were ^anone who were Amalekites or Amulonites, or who were of the order of Nehor, but they were actual descendants of Laman and Lemuel.

 30 And thus we can plainly discern, that after a people have been once ^aenlightened by the ^bSpirit of God, and have had great^cknowledge of things pertaining to righteousness, and then have^dfallen away into sin and transgression, they become more^ehardened, and thus their state becomes ^fworse than though they had never known these things.

---I love this chapter because I'm shown that if we repent of our sins and no more comit that sin and stay away from temptation, we may die a righteous people but we MUST repent, always.